Ditch the Resolution. This Year, Set an Intention That Actually Changes How You Feel
If you are wondering why New Year’s goals never stick and you’re ready to ditch them before the calendar page flips, here is a different way to feel and heal throughout the year.
Why New Year’s Resolutions Fail and What Actually Helps You Feel Better Instead
Every year, people set goals with the hope that this will finally be the year things feel different.
More loved. More confident. More successful. More at calm.
But for many women, especially high-achieving ones, those goals quietly fall apart within weeks.
Not because they lack discipline or follow through, but because the goals themselves were never aligned with what they were truly trying to create.
Most resolutions focus on outcomes. Very few are rooted in intention. And almost none begin with how you actually want your life to feel.
Why High Functioning Anxiety and New Year’s Goals Do Not Mix
Women with high-functioning anxiety are often amazing at setting goals.
They know how to perform, achieve, and check all boxes. They are used to choosing goals based on what looks right or what they think they should want.
The problem is not effort. The problem is alignment.
When goals are chosen without intention or connection to values, they often reinforce pressure rather than relieve it.
So you end up chasing outcomes that look impressive but feel empty, exhausting, or unsustainable.
That is why so many goals feel heavy instead of motivating. They are not wrong goals because you failed.
They are wrong goals because they were never yours to begin with.What We Are Really Looking for Is a Feeling
When someone says they want to lose weight, get organized, or finally feel confident, there is usually something deeper underneath that desire.
What they are really looking for is a feeling.
Healthy.
Calm.
Freedom.
Confidence.
Connection.
We do not want the outcome itself. We want how we believe life will feel once we achieve it.
When you skip this step and go straight to the goal, you end up working toward something without ever asking whether it actually aligns with your values or the life you want to create.
If you want support clarifying the feelings you are actually trying to create this year, I created a free intention setting practice I use with my clients every January.
A Simple Ritual That Supports Feeling and Healing All Year
Instead of setting resolutions, I invite my clients and myself to choose three to five feelings to focus on for the year.
Not aspirational or performative feelings. Honest ones.
These feelings become a compass.
They help guide decisions, boundaries, and priorities throughout the year.
When you are clear on how you want to feel, it becomes easier to say yes to what supports that and no to what does not.
This is not about doing more.
It's about living with intention.How Small Daily Choices Change How You Feel Over Time
Once you are clear on your feelings, the practice becomes simple.
Put your words somewhere you will see every day.
Each day, you ask this one question:
What is one small choice I can make today that supports how I want to feel?
Some days that choice may be rest.
Some days it may be reaching out to someone honesty.
Some days it is choosing yourself instead of pleasing others.
Over time, these small choices shape your year. Not through force or pressure, but through consistency and alignment.
An Invitation to Begin Without Pressure
Life will happen. There will be seasons where the feelings you chose may feel harder to access. That does not mean you failed. It means you are human.
I can’t tell you how many times I have seen this approach work
In fact, I can probably tell you more times than not.
It works because it adapts to real life. It allows growth without perfection and change without self-abandonment.
If you want support in beginning this ritual, I created a free guided reflection that I walk my clients through each year.
It helps you take stock of what you are ready to leave behind and intentionally choose how you want to feel moving forward.
You do not need better goals. You need clearer intention.
From there, everything else begins to shift.
Because You Deserve A 2026 That Feels Even Better Than It Looks
Get your 2026 Intention Setting workbook and start moving toward a life you love living.
It’s a step by step guide to help you get clear and foundational on how you want to feel and get you started living a life that doesn’t just check the boxes, but one you love.
One that feels even better than it looks. And one you can’t wait to wake up to.
Are you are tired of setting goals that look good on paper but don’t feel good in your life?
Therapy can help you connect with what matters most.
If you are ready for support creating a life that doesn’t just look good, but feels even better, more aligned, and more you, I offer a free 20-minute consultation to explore if therapy with EleVolve is the best next step for you with clarity and confidence.
